Tear Me Down

<span style="font-style:italic;">One word, friends: <a href="http://melissabxoxo.blogspot.com/2012/03/bully-movie.html">Bullies</a>. I honestly don't get them. They're sad. They're cowards. I wrote this one this afternoon with those thoughts in mind. If there's one thing I'm sure of, it's that I won't stand for anyone getting bullied. Ever. xoxo</span><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRpnnl5EZdeVn3Tqb6zkM4rV-l7fgAf8w-Lfai8rWQer4WbjDzURVznsNl5j4x3TSliLRTSBfrPwOehINCT8ayAKUmj5IlICI74KJnW5_-_8VAC8I8lUjDsQpVGboPlNEf-3V44J2qPbs/s1600/01.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5725409214966953554" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRpnnl5EZdeVn3Tqb6zkM4rV-l7fgAf8w-Lfai8rWQer4WbjDzURVznsNl5j4x3TSliLRTSBfrPwOehINCT8ayAKUmj5IlICI74KJnW5_-_8VAC8I8lUjDsQpVGboPlNEf-3V44J2qPbs/s400/01.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" /></a><span style="font-style:italic;"><div align="center">So here we are, crossing paths again<br />I walk by and avoid your gaze<br />Because nothing I say ever makes a difference<br />You just hear what you want to hear<br />And make up your own mind anyway<br /><br />You, you try to take me down<br />Try to make me second-guess myself<br /><br />You thought it would be easy to tear me down<br />It won't be<br />You thought you were intimidating<br />It doesn't work on me<br />I've grown into the person I want to be<br />So why isn't that enough for you?<br /><br />Since when do you think you're better than everyone?<br />It must be hard to see the world from way up high<br />Wearing your crown and sitting on your throne<br />Do you ever feel alone?<br /><br />You, you try to take me down<br />Try to make me second-guess myself<br /><br />You thought it would be easy to tear me down<br />It won't be<br />You thought you were intimidating<br />It doesn't work on me<br />I've grown into the person I want to be<br />So why isn't that enough for you?<br /><br />Well, good luck on your mission<br />Your mission of destruction<br /><br />You thought it would be easy to tear me down<br />It won't be<br />You thought you were intimidating<br />It doesn't work on me<br />I've grown into the person I want to be<br />So why isn't that enough for you?<br /><br />You thought it would be easy to tear me down<br />It won't be<br />You thought you were intimidating<br />It doesn't work on me<br />I've grown into the person I want to be<br />So why isn't that enough for you?</div></span><br /><br />[Photo via <a href="http://weheartit.com/entry/25725969">We Heart It</a>]

Tear Me Down

One word, friends: Bullies . I honestly don't get them. They're sad. They're cowards. I wrote this one this afternoon with those...

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Bully movie

<div align="center"><iframe width="400" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/eUy2ZWoStr0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></div><a href="http://thebullyproject.com/">Bully</a>, which has sparked criticism over its R rating, opens in theaters on March 30th. I wish the MPAA would change the rating to PG-13, so the film could reach the very demographic that <em>desperately needs</em> to see it. Are you going to see it, friends?<br /><br />P.S. Remember <a href="http://melissabxoxo.blogspot.com/2011/10/dear-bully.html">Dear Bully</a>?<br /><br /><em>**Update: Here's a <a href="http://www.change.org/petitions/mpaa-don-t-let-the-bullies-win-give-bully-a-pg-13-instead-of-an-r-rating">petition</a> to get the MPAA to change the rating. There's already more than 450,000 signatures!! Be a part of the change and stop bullying!</em>

Bully movie

Bully , which has sparked criticism over its R rating, opens in theaters on March 30th. I wish the MPAA would change the rating to PG-13, so...

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An Open Letter To Rihanna

Dear Rihanna:<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhneXhpLRAhiqMggpkVdaR9Ey2t02ixlnPNy7Hh7gEPfOZ1ni-W82YI5dBmEv1ud4irJa_KJqtfL4fhHplOf2uzYKFyk5ztoIlFNJ3pfshunUAXvOVcovyQONkbtjUDs5el8tq7Fnkjc5A/s1600/01.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5713918195370238690" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhneXhpLRAhiqMggpkVdaR9Ey2t02ixlnPNy7Hh7gEPfOZ1ni-W82YI5dBmEv1ud4irJa_KJqtfL4fhHplOf2uzYKFyk5ztoIlFNJ3pfshunUAXvOVcovyQONkbtjUDs5el8tq7Fnkjc5A/s400/01.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" /></a>I've always admired you. You've always projected this air of strength and independence that is so inspiring, especially in today's world where those very things are so easily looked down on. You're fearless. You're the woman who isn't afraid of anything.<br /><br />But now? Well, I'm worried that I'm worrying enough for the both of us. You see, ever since I discovered that you're <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/20/rihanna-chris-brown-reunite-on-two-remixes_n_1289805.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000003">possibly collaborating with Chris Brown</a>, I can't help but feel like my heart is sinking just a little bit. I worry about you. I'm sad for you. Everyone and their brother seems to be mad at you, and I'll admit that my face was red with rage when I first heard the news. A million little questions ran through my mind, like...<br /><br /><span style="font-style:italic;">What is she thinking?<br />How stupid must she be?<br />Did she just forget everything he did to her?</span><br /><br />And the more I thought about it -- and the more questions I asked myself -- the more I realized just how anger-fueled these questions were. To paraphrase Adele, there was a fire burning in my heart. I was seething mad. Just like the rest of the world. But unlike the rest of the world, I'm not angry with you. I'm angry -- burning with anger, remember -- at him. <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwS2TOBoX3C2w9KLHFlQZyLMgy33-9mhZ1NwrWMRkfYRYBga-mIxmoTAxVun-26Mz-98VNVAxlSDTYwNSpRKhVPImljF6VnAq3m9tR1x_FHkrGCoE9WznuG-tWOgZ4VZQGs8mpJzVn8Eg/s1600/02.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5713918191598373410" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwS2TOBoX3C2w9KLHFlQZyLMgy33-9mhZ1NwrWMRkfYRYBga-mIxmoTAxVun-26Mz-98VNVAxlSDTYwNSpRKhVPImljF6VnAq3m9tR1x_FHkrGCoE9WznuG-tWOgZ4VZQGs8mpJzVn8Eg/s400/02.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 268px;" /></a>So that's precisely what this letter is about. It's about how you're worth it. It's about how no guy is worth any part of you if he doesn't respect all of you. You're deserving of a love in which you don't have to compromise or settle. Yes, it can be scary to move on, but a lot of times, we're stronger than we give ourselves credit for. Sometimes moving on means getting in touch with that stronger self we never knew we had.<br /><br />You once sang about finding love in a hopeless place. Maybe that love isn't with another person. Maybe it's a love for yourself. Because once you have that love (it's the sort of greatest love of all that the great Whitney Houston once sang of...), no one -- especially a guy -- can take it away from you. It's yours. There's a certain power in knowing that, isn't there? So, I hope you'll find it. On your own terms, because you most certainly deserve it.<br /><br />[Photos via <a href="http://www.thefrisky.com/">The Frisky</a> and <a href="http://www.leloveimage.blogspot.com/">Le Love</a>]

An Open Letter To Rihanna

Dear Rihanna: I've always admired you. You've always projected this air of strength and independence that is so inspiring, especiall...

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Guest Post: The 7 types to 'unfriend' on Facebook

Hi, all, I am the owner of <a href="’http://www.thegirlieblog.com’">Girlie Blog Seattle</a>, and I write about beauty, fashion, and enjoying life in Seattle. I am so honored that Melissa asked me to guest post. I love reading her blog because it brightens my day. Today, I am writing about types of people to “unfriend” on Facebook. I know this is a somewhat controversial topic, and you might have opinions to express, but please keep comments cordial.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZbw4vQ5Ocjp2c9wwOc1GtQ3JDOQk9hLkA21EpgCqhZU2Vy8vhCM6jWlCN4l2bdLlXRdN16T9FF8NE_Ss0qDRphyphenhyphenkBzoOGKlzLow20JsSlnNVSFySMUhfB3U_JqDBOwQB7_uQsk7dseDw/s1600/01.png" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5711626218810443026" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZbw4vQ5Ocjp2c9wwOc1GtQ3JDOQk9hLkA21EpgCqhZU2Vy8vhCM6jWlCN4l2bdLlXRdN16T9FF8NE_Ss0qDRphyphenhyphenkBzoOGKlzLow20JsSlnNVSFySMUhfB3U_JqDBOwQB7_uQsk7dseDw/s400/01.png" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 394px;" /></a><span style="font-weight:bold;">The Narcissist</span><br />Have you ever seen someone so perfect? She has the perfect man who never argues with her, perfect friends who’ll do anything for her, a perfect job that she loves, perfectly good looks that every girl is jealous of and the perfect life she feels everyone should want. Her pictures have perfectly practiced poses, with perfectly styled outfits. Every wall post is either an achievement – implicitly stated or subtly implied – or some kind of sentimental reminder about her beautiful life. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">The Ghost</span><br />You were friends, or even best buds, back in high school. You have lost touch until Facebook connected you. Now that you’ve “friended” each other and caught up, you have seized communication again for the past two years. Don’t worry. You won’t miss each other. If you have lived a good life since high school, without your “ghost” friend, you’ll live a good life still.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">The Gossip Columnist</span><br />You ask her, “What’s going on?” She tells you what’s going on with everyone else. None of the information seems significant or has trustworthy resources. In fact, your conversations with her always revolves around someone else’s business, and she seems way too interested in talking about them, for no reason at all.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">The User</span><br />The user has no shame. He invites you to a party across town, but expects a ride, because he has no car. If you don’t offer him a ride, he’ll tell all your common friends about how sorry he is to miss out, right in front of you, until you offer him a ride. He has guilt-ed you into giving him a ride numerous times, but never offers gas, or coffee or some type of nice gesture so you wouldn’t feel used. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">The One-Upper</span><br />You tell her that you have been busy. She tells you that she’s much busier, even though she calls you up Friday nights and talks your ears off until you fall asleep on the phone. Then she’ll call you up next Friday night, strategically on her way to dinner and reminds you again that she’s busy.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">The Promise Breaker</span><br />He has been asking you to meet up for months, but bails out every time you plan something. He tells you that he’ll take you out for your birthday. But when the check comes -- and you offer to pay for yourself to be nice -- he’ll gladly let you. He tells you that he’ll do nice things for you, but then drops off the face of the earth.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">Your boss</span><br />If you don’t want someone to see old college photos of you flipping off the camera, chugging beer or doing anything “fun,” unfriend. Better yet, don’t add them in the first place.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">What do you think of this list? Anything you would add? Delete? Are you selective about who you friend on Facebook? :)</span><br /><br />[Graph via <a href="http://graphjam.memebase.com/2010/11/05/funny-graphs-why-use-facebook-unexplained/">Graphjam</a>]

Guest Post: The 7 types to 'unfriend' on Facebook

Hi, all, I am the owner of Girlie Blog Seattle , and I write about beauty, fashion, and enjoying life in Seattle. I am so honored that Melis...

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Oxygen

<span style="font-style:italic;">I just wrote this one this morning when I got to think of guys - and people in general -- who just bring us down in life. Sometimes, we let them bring us down in life when really, we should be walking away. And then we finally have that moment when we realize it's time to walk away. We can finally breathe again. Have you ever felt this way, friends? xoxo</span><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBoSPNyZN4bGakaeYkgbiS9eLs5ruZ5OWbiLx7wsg9MKDJ-s7UxJVTbE2UAiD7W8ZgOgglgOxozor4oB3cvMT16PCQzqI-1QyGU5WtRTJMfe_DUymUNmcLOXfJI86QaDYB6KnhW7_VfuU/s1600/01.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5694208483633387970" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBoSPNyZN4bGakaeYkgbiS9eLs5ruZ5OWbiLx7wsg9MKDJ-s7UxJVTbE2UAiD7W8ZgOgglgOxozor4oB3cvMT16PCQzqI-1QyGU5WtRTJMfe_DUymUNmcLOXfJI86QaDYB6KnhW7_VfuU/s400/01.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 270px;" /></a><div align="center"><span style="font-style:italic;">The floors creak beneath my feet and remind me of when we used to dance<br />And how we'd dance through the night just to see the sun rise<br />Being with you was like a dream I could live forever<br />Now I can't tell the truth from the lies<br /><br />That girl's face in the mirror<br />I don't recognize her anymore<br />What has she let herself become?<br />She thought it would be so easy<br />When all she's left with is a painful memory<br />Doesn't know how to breathe in a room full of oxygen<br /><br />You made me believe that love was those stars I saw in your eyes and the way your hand felt in mine <br />But you dragged me down like an anchor<br />How could I not see those eyes fooling me? <br />Before I could catch my breath, your love pulled me under<br /><br />That girl's face in the mirror<br />I don't recognize her anymore<br />What has she let herself become?<br />She thought it would be so easy<br />When all she's left with is a painful memory<br />Doesn't know how to breathe in a room full of oxygen<br /><br />I'm not going down with your ship<br />So I'm saying goodbye, like two ghosts in the night<br />So I'm saying goodbye, like two ghosts in the night<br /><br />That girl's face in the mirror<br />I don't recognize her anymore<br />What has she let herself become?<br />She thought it would be so easy<br />When all she's left with is a painful memory<br />Doesn't know how to breathe in a room full of oxygen<br /><br />That girl's face in the mirror<br />I don't recognize her anymore<br />What has she let herself become?<br />She thought it would be so easy<br />When all she's left with is a painful memory<br />Doesn't know how to breathe in a room full of oxygen</span></div><br /><br />[Photos via <a href="http://weheartit.com/entry/20594911">We Heart It</a>]

Oxygen

I just wrote this one this morning when I got to think of guys - and people in general -- who just bring us down in life. Sometimes, we let ...

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MEMO TO MEN: Your cheating heart

TO: Men all over the planet <br />FROM: Melissa <br />RE: How NOT to become Ashton & Demi<br />DATE: December 15, 2011<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxQSI8CpMocJrEIGABcVv1JQfNnli9CdQdrWLRpWG7bKyBM9mh-HvlL0bzEH6DgoUkp94U7j2jfDigb8EnsEjdKIpVw0RABkRC8_pww_jdoOvqeT8KvyGJLReXkYMzN1yYBmqY8Nq9UZKb/s1600/01.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5686461091271308162" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxQSI8CpMocJrEIGABcVv1JQfNnli9CdQdrWLRpWG7bKyBM9mh-HvlL0bzEH6DgoUkp94U7j2jfDigb8EnsEjdKIpVw0RABkRC8_pww_jdoOvqeT8KvyGJLReXkYMzN1yYBmqY8Nq9UZKb/s400/01.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 267px;" /></a>Cheating. Infidelity. Unfaithful. These are all such taboo words, aren't they? And yet, boys, there's a certain allure to them -- a hint of mystique, if you will. Well, they hold allure at least for some of you. Now, I'm not pointing any fingers here (<span style="font-style:italic;">cough*ASHTON*cough</span>), but this whole cheating, grass-is-always-greener trend has, frankly, over-stayed its welcome. The latest casualty couple: <a href="http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20547430,00.html">Demi Moore</a> and <a href="http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20546665,00.html">Ashton Kutcher</a>. I know, boys. You're probably wondering, "<span style="font-style:italic;">What could I possibly learn from a celebrity IT couple?</span>" One word: Plenty. And of course, you're lucky because I'm here to remind you exactly what lessons you can take away from the demise of this supposedly happy couple...<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">Don't judge a gentleman by his cover</span><br />I'll admit that this divorce threw me a bit. I mean, it wasn't on par with a Nick/Jessica split, which sent me to bed for a week from shock (<span style="font-style:italic;">just kidding...</span>), but it seemed like they were on the road to wedded bliss rather than the road to splitsville. And Ashton seemed like the perfect gentleman. Apparently, that wasn't true. So, boys, just because you may act like a gentleman and say all the things any fine gentleman would say, don't think we're not going to do a little Intel with our friends to see if you're getting your gentleman on with them too. Consider it standard operating procedure.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">The truth will always come out</span><br />You can only keep a secret affair hidden for so long until it becomes, well, decidedly less secret and more public fodder. And technology hasn't helped in the hiding of secrets, either. Might I advise you not to try to deny or excuse your way out of it. It will be easier on everyone if you own up to your actions, trust me. Think about it this way, boys: I've already lost respect for you since I found out about your secret rendezvous...do you really think you can afford to make me lose any more?<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">Dating younger isn't always better</span><br />If you had asked me a couple of <a href="http://melissabxoxo.blogspot.com/2009/08/open-letter-to-my-fellow-mrs-robinsons.html">years</a> <a href="http://melissabxoxo.blogspot.com/2009/09/open-letter-to-chace-crawford-and-all.html">ago</a>, I would have said that dating a younger guy was hands-down the smartest thing invented since the trapper keeper. They make you laugh (<span style="font-style:italic;">the guy, not the trapper keeper</span>). They remind you to have fun (<span style="font-style:italic;">the guy, not the trapper keeper</span>). And they haven't lived life long enough to become jaded and cynical (<span style="font-style:italic;">the guy, not the trapper keeper</span>). It all seemed so perfect. It was all so alluring. Until you ultimately realize it was none of those things. Instead, you come to (<span style="font-style:italic;">painfully</span>) realize that instead of being fun, he's immature. You realize his ability to make you laugh is merely hiding the fact that he refuses to take anything seriously. And you realize that the fact that he hasn't lived life long enough is actually a pretty bad thing and not nearly as good and refreshing as you thought it was. The differences outweigh the good similarities here, and you'll both end up, well, the next Ashton and Demi.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHhvE5B_TarLf4tOil0ifG7oub1IV9iU2tu3Z4WZq5GWAElaEsHCHL2VTQ1hDOHTRiAesXTMW2f9PGdm0cEVzFWkOoMPNmdOMtk7PZEEw12zk4dGGUpLhmiSD8p9b_4H47Xh7mJhttaRpc/s1600/02.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5686461086255183346" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHhvE5B_TarLf4tOil0ifG7oub1IV9iU2tu3Z4WZq5GWAElaEsHCHL2VTQ1hDOHTRiAesXTMW2f9PGdm0cEVzFWkOoMPNmdOMtk7PZEEw12zk4dGGUpLhmiSD8p9b_4H47Xh7mJhttaRpc/s400/02.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 250px;" /></a><span style="font-weight:bold;">Does this make sense, boys? Anything else you think I missed from this list? Let me know, and remember: Your cheating heart will tell on you... xoxo</span>

MEMO TO MEN: Your cheating heart

TO: Men all over the planet FROM: Melissa RE: How NOT to become Ashton & Demi DATE: December 15, 2011 Cheating. Infidelity. Unfaithful. ...

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Love Lounge: Is monogamy negotiable?

<div align="center"> </div><a href="http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7033/6419617913_514924fcdb_o.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7033/6419617913_514924fcdb_o.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 600px;" /></a><a href="https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/SRZP9YS">Women's Heath</a> magazine recently asked this question on its Web site: Is monogamy negotiable? <br /><br />Honestly, monogamy and negotiable don't even belong in the same sentence. They're like magnets that repel each other. There are certain things in life that lend themselves easily to negotiation. Shopping at flea markets. Buying a car. Choosing a restaurant for dinner. Making plans for the weekend. Those things are negotiable.<br /><br />Love is most definitely not one of those things. Because love isn't something you can negotiate. You can't turn it off and on whenever you please like a light switch, your feelings magically disappearing and reappearing at regularly timed intervals. <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQvOrhHA_4NZjrmaQz25mwqOkZYOf4PZwm6LH0HUpcru1lPXpAabGQAFNAKQXMd8t291nxWQk_GAT_ddR_KRfgoZgAT47vb55_uIyr_IFExpyeva6O02q30sh6UMyHCcmBOKZu_pBrL5iz/s1600/01.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5680101933819606306" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQvOrhHA_4NZjrmaQz25mwqOkZYOf4PZwm6LH0HUpcru1lPXpAabGQAFNAKQXMd8t291nxWQk_GAT_ddR_KRfgoZgAT47vb55_uIyr_IFExpyeva6O02q30sh6UMyHCcmBOKZu_pBrL5iz/s400/01.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 267px;" /></a>Besides, if you're allowing room for negotiation in relationships, isn't that really just the same thing as a no-string-attached love affair? We all know how well those turn out (<span style="font-style:italic;">cue sarcasm....</span>). Someone always ends up getting emotionally attached (<span style="font-style:italic;">that would probably be me</span>). Someone always ends up falling for the other (<span style="font-style:italic;">that would most likely be me</span>). And someone always has trouble admitting their feelings to the other person (<span style="font-style:italic;">that would most definitely be me</span>).<br /><br />You can't choose to be monogamous when it suits you. It's one of those refreshingly black-and-white things: Either you commit to another person or you don't. It's as easy as that. In love - and in life - you should never stand for anything less than you deserve. Do you really think you deserve to be someone's sloppy seconds?<br /><div align="center"> </div><a href="http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6228/6419618147_439f9002e9_o.jpg"""><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6228/6419618147_439f9002e9_o.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 437px;" /></a><span style="font-weight:bold;">What about you, friends? Is monogamy something you'd ever negotiate? How do you feel about couples who do? How would you define negotiate? What does it mean to you? Let's chat! xoxo</span><br /><br />[Photos via <a href="http://leloveimage.blogspot.com/">Le Love</a>]

Love Lounge: Is monogamy negotiable?

Women's Heath magazine recently asked this question on its Web site: Is monogamy negotiable? Honestly, monogamy and negotiable don...

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MEMO TO MEN: Let's talk R-E-S-P-E-C-T

TO: Men all over the planet <br />FROM: Melissa <br />RE: Have some respect<br />DATE: October 31, 2011<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFijHgBdsnm0bDMGFpS1oNrH79d2No385KUnsqIXbv2JDI0DUra92mbyG8p_n1dBRGdINONwxXcbT11gRhWFcNVqfOeoWk1EObSYF9PmEppqoENGDZGFkGJBWBVqMAPrUG3KhXf3BQVfyU/s1600/01.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5669666721002704898" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFijHgBdsnm0bDMGFpS1oNrH79d2No385KUnsqIXbv2JDI0DUra92mbyG8p_n1dBRGdINONwxXcbT11gRhWFcNVqfOeoWk1EObSYF9PmEppqoENGDZGFkGJBWBVqMAPrUG3KhXf3BQVfyU/s400/01.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" /></a><strong><em>"Value yourself enough to choose to be with someone who wants you as much as you want them."</em></strong><br /><br />I came across that quote yesterday, boys, and quickly realized it was the perfect opener for today's lesson. And before you ask, no, this is <em>not</em> about me. I promise.<br /><br />Respect. <br /><br />Everybody wants it and thinks they deserve it. And yet, some are so unwilling to give it in return. And when it comes to respect and relationships, the two are mutually exclusive; you can't have one without the other. I know how difficult it can be to always love yourself. After all, we're our own worst critic, and all it takes is one look in the mirror and we're already rattling off a laundry list of our supposed "shortcomings." <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoXqL-ko7sm6ZszI5X6K2nNYQSsZOsL2WNKskakw9tdRhSO528aprBDlttxBxSaE-B0Zj9Fks8LDandfoMCa8Qp7FUjsN7Y-Jo04j8JS99ntjFMEfYMwDJxH3jP_UNi1qrlMLOYf_ngSM_/s1600/02.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5669666713214778978" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoXqL-ko7sm6ZszI5X6K2nNYQSsZOsL2WNKskakw9tdRhSO528aprBDlttxBxSaE-B0Zj9Fks8LDandfoMCa8Qp7FUjsN7Y-Jo04j8JS99ntjFMEfYMwDJxH3jP_UNi1qrlMLOYf_ngSM_/s400/02.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" /></a>It saddens me to see that, of course, but what makes me downright sick to my stomach, boys? People who see that vulnerability in other people and pounce on it as if it were their own chew toy to do with it whatever they'd like.<br /><br />In recent months, I've seen this happen, and honestly, it just broken my heart. No, wait, it more than breaks my heart. It disgusts me. How could you ever think so little of someone that you think it would be OK to pretend to care about them? How could you ever think it would be OK to blatantly use someone as if they were your puppet on a string? Well here's a wake-up call, boys: It's <span style="font-style:italic;">not</span> OK. Pretending you care about someone just so you can get what you want is about as low as you can go. And not feeling bad about said pretending is stooping even lower. It makes me wonder how in the world you ended up with such a skewed sense of values. Or if you even have any at all.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEik8fFuv5JLXQU4C18dCROvrrEh4BG2lvoiLkviI38c2ynKf8ZboRQP2ddJOnpswhtdAA1EJ2jvjoGwj9k1O520VImBsIMs9gMflf0PG__sSLf3HHIpzmIPqJFTqiDoQFjJA8pIfKXS4UJD/s1600/03.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5669666709549715074" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEik8fFuv5JLXQU4C18dCROvrrEh4BG2lvoiLkviI38c2ynKf8ZboRQP2ddJOnpswhtdAA1EJ2jvjoGwj9k1O520VImBsIMs9gMflf0PG__sSLf3HHIpzmIPqJFTqiDoQFjJA8pIfKXS4UJD/s400/03.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" /></a>So I suppose that it should come as no surprise that if, in the very unlikely of circumstances, I should find myself in a "relationship" with one of you, boys, you can be sure I'm going to call you out on it. <br /><br />Because those type of boys? They aren't to be respected. They aren't to be cheered. In my mind, they aren't even to be liked. They are cowards. They are jerks. Everyone deserve more than that. They are worth more than that. <br /><br />[Photos via <a href="http://ourstardust.tumblr.com/">Calendar Girl</a>]

MEMO TO MEN: Let's talk R-E-S-P-E-C-T

TO: Men all over the planet FROM: Melissa RE: Have some respect DATE: October 31, 2011 "Value yourself enough to choose to be with some...

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Dear Bully

<div align="center"> </div><a href="http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6032/6279974607_9324ca211c_o.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6032/6279974607_9324ca211c_o.jpg" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 580px;" /></a>I'll just come right out and say it: I <em>hate</em> bullies. In fact, there's nothing I detest more.<br /><br />I hear the stories from my mom, the stories of her students who are afraid to come to school, the stories of students who don't think twice about laughing at and calling other students down-right nasty names. I've even witnessed bullying more in my adult life than I ever did as a teenager. People who thrive on putting others down just to make themselves feel superior is just, well...incredibly sad. And when that bullying takes the form of adults bullying other adults? It's just plain pathetic, isn't it? No one should ever have that much power to make you feel so small.<br /><br />So in honor of October being <a href="http://www.stompoutbullying.org/student_participation_toolkit.php">Bullying Awareness Month</a>, I was so glad when I came across the recently released anthology <a href="http://www.dearbully.com/">Dear Bully</a>. The book features 70 authors reflecting on their own experiences with bullying, whether they were the victims of bullying or the ones doing the bullying.<br /><br />It scares me that more and more people, especially adults, are thinking it's cool to turn into real-life Mean Girls. Let's stop it, shall we, friends? The next time you see an act of bullying, stand up and stop it. Because, really, if you just walk by and do nothing, you're just as bad as those who are doing the actual bullying. <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfREjbNZbJR3SKp-KYTHiyTajrmIuwYWBbgkvP4l91OhwnmHz_savg3A-anChpktDacRWvrChxaM7G0zeTkD9_aq-i4vt4zm0s37ms0T10f_S238KJXYasOPX8Ea8L88s55cSI1psaZn08/s1600/aa.gif"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5667464310634742146" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfREjbNZbJR3SKp-KYTHiyTajrmIuwYWBbgkvP4l91OhwnmHz_savg3A-anChpktDacRWvrChxaM7G0zeTkD9_aq-i4vt4zm0s37ms0T10f_S238KJXYasOPX8Ea8L88s55cSI1psaZn08/s400/aa.gif" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 0px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 380px;" /></a><strong>And here's an interesting question: If you've been a victim of bullying and had the chance, what would you say to the person who bullied you? If you found yourself bullying other people, what would you say to them? What's your bully story?</strong><br /><br />You can buy the book <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Dear-Bully-Seventy-Authors-Stories/dp/0062060988/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1319556620&sr=1-1">here</a>.<br /><br />P.S. Additional new essays not included in the book are posted once a week <a href="http://dearbully.wordpress.com/one-new-story-a-week/">here</a>.<br /><br />[Bottom graphic via <a href="http://www.dosomething.org">Do Something</a>]

Dear Bully

I'll just come right out and say it: I hate bullies. In fact, there's nothing I detest more. I hear the stories from my mom, the s...

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